有的和沒有的.|紀念.}

君生我未生，我生君已老。






You Are Not Alone －Michael Jackson

Another day has gone
I'm still all alone
How could this be
You're not here with me
You never said goodbye
Someone tell me why
Did you have to go
And leave my world so cold
Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away
Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay
You are not alone
I am here with you
Jackson Michael
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
You are not alone
All alone
Why, oh
Just the other night
I thought I heard you cry
Asking me to come
And hold you in my arms
I can hear your prayers
Your burdens I will bear
But first I need your hand
So forever can begin
Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away
Then something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay
For you are not alone
I am here with you
You're always in my heart
And you are not alone
Whisper three words and I'll come runnin'
And girl you know that I'll be there
I'll be there
You are not alone
I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay
You are not alone
I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
You are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay
For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
For you are not alone。




会记得的。
你的礼帽，你的皮鞋，你的时代。那个回头看都让人觉得耀眼的时代。

去你的坟前蹲下来放一朵花，永远的MJ。

在听《1900》的OST。
原谅我的不长进，听了这么多次照样掉眼泪。

分查了。全省5000多的排名。不拔尖也不算太差劲的结果。
所以说，接下来怎么生活只是事在人为而已。

17号的时候去了北京，遇到那儿夏天里少有的好天气。

在故宫看镀金铜炉上面的刀痕。
在万寿寺主殿看四尊佛像。
在观复看木制家具。
在烟袋斜街的小店里晃悠。
在八达岭的台阶上吹风。
在颐和园走一条仿佛没有尽头的长廊。

走马观花地如此种种。

这个世界有多挤。我终究也不过是众生之一而已。
不好也不坏地活着，永远对自己现状不满意，总有俗不可耐的幻想，以及熠熠生光的愿望。

我有没有说过自己有多喜欢那些高大沉静的树。
比如胡杨，比如白桦，比如银杉。

天坛公园里到处是百年以上的桧柏。
我一棵棵走近，诚惶诚恐小心翼翼地伸手去摸它们身上蜿蜒的纹路。
那是几天北京行里遇到的唯一一个太阳毒辣的白天。
是跟手抚那些斑驳城墙或者玉石雕筑的走兽完全不一样的感觉。

这座有多少凝固历史集结一身的城，可是我带回来印象最深的，只有那天手掌覆盖在桧柏表皮上那种细密厚实的触感而已。

那些沉默深邃的长者。是怎样平和豁达地穿过百年的日升星沉，在一个光披满身的大晴天，它们看到一个南国来的后辈，眼里写满忐忑与崇敬，谨慎地慢慢覆上它们的枝干。然后，世界无声。

要怎么讲才能书写出那些洞悉于心的细节。

这个时代有那么多的不尽人意。
而我庆幸还能见到你们，枝叶相连根茎交错，支撑起一个永不褪色的信仰。

数百岁的你。

我的长辈。我的祖先。我的老师。



以前听过的一段歌词怎么唱来着，

Every step I take／every move I make 
Every single day／every time I pray
What a life to take／what a bond to break
I'll be missing you。


做一棵树，然后慢慢朽去。

银时是总攻=__________=。

心血来潮翻看下BLOG里隐起来了的几篇06年的日志，没到一半已经捂脸= =。

……
同志们！老夫当年也是一傻逼呀！！
寥寥数笔看得我百感交集泪流满面……实在是挑战人底线的好物！
……妈的我当时究竟怎么想的居然这样都打得出来。

“总有一天你自己搞死你自己！”说的在理呀。

向那些曾看过且忍着牙酸忍着鸡皮没抖下来的大爷们致敬。
飚泪鞠躬。


TIPS：影《I Am Sam》，荐。

哈哈哈。哈哈哈哈。我还俗鸟。

最后一篇BLOG的时间显示是2008-6-23。要刻在骨子里了，那个远去的2008年。

关于青春的字眼。年少轻狂的，狗血的，诗意的，俗烂的，勾心斗角的，矫揉造作的，幼稚的可笑的。
随便好了，走过了就不再回头，未来这种东西，迷茫也罢憧憬也好，永远不会有正在经历的这一刻的同等真实感。
我只是想活得更加问心无愧而已。

拾班。
虽然不是小团体主义分子，但多少会有话不投机半句多的人。
可是呢，我再多抱怨再多不满，到了最后记住的还是最好的你们。
看的电影喝的奶茶压的马路调侃的老师互抄的笔记。
黑板上写着那句“十班万岁”那天相机手机不在身边没能拍下来到现在也觉得遗憾。

6月7日。
开考的大日子。还有因此没能及时说出的那句生日快乐。
Allen Iverson。你34岁了。
没有戒指，被人指手划脚说三道四，速度与年龄成反比，离开费城后几经辗转依然不够理想。
所以。即使你听不见我的话。即使你没有计算过这世界有多少人大声喊着你的名字。即使底特律是个资源枯竭治安紊乱的老工业城。即使08-09赛季PLAY OFF的首轮出局。那么多遗憾那么多质疑与唏嘘。会一直为你鼓掌的人记得算我一个。
明亮深邃的眼睛，唯一的3号。
我们永远爱你。我们永远爱你。永远爱你。


我还是那个伪愤青伪文艺伪脱俗的家伙。
路还很长，昂首挺胸走下去。

好了，双手合十，过个不眠夜，各自好好生活吧大家。

300多天。其实细数起来也不太远了。

直至今天，我还是不想说什么自己现在所处的时期是所谓的束缚和倾轧。毕竟还没有过遭遇生活巨大的浩劫和磨难，没有经历社会现实的残酷反差。随随便便地怨天尤人跟无病呻吟根本没多大区别。

预计不到接下去的日子要失去多少来换回一纸通知，而我也想不出什么催泪桥段去注解说明那些意料之内必经的艰难辛酸。

这不会是十年寒窗的终点。
它也未必能带来什么更为光鲜的未来，更不是生活意义所在。

但至少值得去尝试。
只谈努力不谈结果。

正如《The House on Mango Street 》一篇书评里所说：
我们总要离开，我们总要回来。

《Tears in heaven》－Eric Clapton。

Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven
I must be strong and carry on
‘cause I know 
I don't belong in heaven

Would you hold my hand 
If I saw you in heaven

Would you help me stand
If I saw you in heaven
I'll find my way 
through night and day

'cause I know 
I just can't stay here in heaven
Time can bring you down
time can bend you knee
Beyond the door 
there is peace I'm sure

and I know 
there'll be no more
tears in heaven。

沙哑深情的嗓音。

在父亲面前，Carey回归成他最挚爱的小女儿。

《Byebye》－Mariah Carey。

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Ya best friend ya baby
Ya man or ya lady
Put ya hand way up high
We will never say bye
Mamas daddys sisters brothers
Friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers
Lift ya head to the sky
Cause we will never say bye
As a child there were them times
I didn't get it but you kept me in line
I didn't know why you didn't show up sometimes
On Sunday mornings and I missed you
But I'm glad we talked through
All them grown folk things
Separation brings
You never let me know it
You never let it show because
You loved me and obviously
There's so much more left to say
If you were with me today
Face to face
Never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on I
Wish I could talk to you for a while
Miss you but I try not to cry
As time goes by
And it's true that you've Reached a better place
Still I'd give the world
To see your face (bye)
And be right here next to you (bye)
But it's like you're gone too soon (bye)
Now the hardest thing to do
Is say bye bye

Bye bye bye bye bye bye
Bye bye bye bye bye bye
Bye bye bye bye bye bye
Bye bye

And you never got a chance
To see how good I done
And you never got to see me
Back at number one
I wish that you were here
To celebrate together
I wish that we could spend
The holidays together
I remember when you used to
Tuck me in at night
With the teddy bear you gave me
That I held so tight
I thought you were so strong
You'd make it through whatever
It's so hard to accept the fact You're gone forever

Never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on I
I wish I could talk to you for a while
Miss you but I try not to cry
As time goes by
And it's true that you've reached a better place
Still I'd give the world
To see your face (bye)
And be right here next to you (bye)
But it's like you're gone too soon (bye)
Now the hardest thing to do 
Is say bye bye

Bye bye bye bye bye bye
Bye bye bye bye bye bye
Bye bye bye bye bye bye
Bye bye 。

借以纪念2008年5月12日。